Blessed Transgressors
by delictabledahlia
Summary: They both want to rule the country, no matter the cost, even when the cost is this utterly disturbing and perverse. Zucest, AU.
1. Chapter 1

_**AN:**_ _This was a small ficlet, but now I think it will be much longer. Over 20 Chapters at least. It's inspired a lot by the arranged sibling marriages in ancient history.  
 **Pairing:**_ _Zuko/Azula. Also: Azula/Ty Lee and Zuko/?  
 **AU:**_ _Aang Was Never Found, Fire Nation won after Sozin's Comet.  
 **Beta:**_ _FanfictionVillainess.  
 **Warnings:**_ _Incest, lemons, a small amount of yuri, what qualifies as child abuse and mentions of rape.  
 **Disclaimer:**_ _I don't own A:TLA. I just think of lemons involving cartoon characters too often to be healthy._

* * *

 **\- The Truth About Forever -**

 **\- by delictabledelias -**

* * *

 _Prologue_

* * *

It is the dead of the night in the Fire Nation, four years after the return of Sozin's Comet and the conquest of the Earth Kingdom. The palace, formidable, dark as obsidian with dim windows at this late hour, is silent, save for the quiet moaning of two of its inhabitants.

Brother and sister, blood of blood. _It's wrong_.

Her nails dig into his bare back, leaving trails of blood and stark white skin. Zuko is on top of her, and he has never felt such a sick thrill. Her lips crush against him again and again and again, not bothering where they land, craving, endless craving. She imagined that his return would only be terrible news for her, but that has proven not to be true.

It was in anger that she sought him out while he was in his bed one night. She stripped off her clothes and he did not say no, even thought she is certain he thought it was wrong. And now, weeks later, they are still sneaking around, still incapable of resisting. Azula wishes she could better control this urge, this urge for something pleasurable and worth risking everything in order to perpetuate it.

Zuko has, by this point, stopped saying that it was wrong, and taking a moment to self righteously protest, before he knows that he wants it to.

They hate each other, unless they are making each other orgasm. But on the other hand, briefly after it ends, when they linger together, they do not want to be apart. There is the strong sensation that they are the only two people who will ever understand what they both have gone through, even if neither of them knows the half of it.

Or maybe it is a fight for dominance. Yes, Azula likes that idea much better. She likes the thought that maybe this is about power and domination, and not about genuine feelings and the inability to express them. Because sex, violence and deceit are easier than confronting their own feelings. Because they were never taught how to be siblings, and so the flicker of compassion, the moments in which they felt for each other, was shrugged off and replaced with these illicit encounters.

But tonight is different; tonight is the night that they get caught. Zuko has just penetrated her, just made a moan escape her lips as he feels surges of pleasure. They are not bothering to keep quiet, as they have for so long. And they are so distracted by the raw, taboo acts that they do not hear footsteps in their solitary hall.

She presses herself against him fiercely, hungrily, not stopping to think about consequence. It feels too good. _Tastes_ too good. The surges and fits of pleasure too _strong_.

Azula gasps and then sinks further into the mattress, her eyes closed, sparing her momentarily from the shadow in the doorframe, and the sound of crashing wood as their only blockade from prying eyes is thrown open and hits the wall.

They pull apart more quickly than they have reacted in sparring matches and when confronted with enemies. It is a blur to Azula, the next thing that happens, because it is completely and entirely targeted at Zuko, without so much as a glance to her as she attempts to cover her naked body.

"What are you doing in here?" Azula finally shouts and their father turns away from having Zuko pinned helplessly by his neck, his back bruised against Azula's shelves.

Hesitation. The Fire Lord is incapable of breathing, much less saying anything. It feels like he has just been struck by a hallucination, and he wonders if he has. His family does have a history of madness.

"What was your brother doing here?" he growls in response.

Azula is speechless, possibly for the first time.

* * *

Ozai paces, flexing his fingers, trying to remind himself to deal with Zuko in a noble and acceptable way, instead of in a fit of rage. That would cause issues that he does not want to raise. His daughter is staring at her knees, now covered by clothing, her cheeks red.

At last, Zuko emerges, fear so readily apparent in his eyes, finally dressed.

"You certainly took your sweet time," Ozai remarks, his lip curled to the left in an angry snarl. "I am a very merciful man, or else I would have finished you. However, because of my ample kindness, I simply want an explanation. I, out of the absolute kindness in my heart, allowed you to return home without fulfilling the terms of your banishment, due to the Comet. And your first instinct is to do _this_ to _her_?"

Zuko does not like how quiet his father is, how he is not burning with rage. It makes Zuko know that he is a level of appalled that Zuko does not think he can escape.

 _Azula_ will escape it, of course, which makes him want to push her off of the roof and see if she's as much a deity as father seems to believe. And he _knows_ she has most likely spent this entire time fabricating such pretty lies to get herself out of any trouble.

"What's _this_?" Zuko asks, his heart pounding like a hammer.

"I... I could not have expected what I happened to walk in on in a thousand years. The idea is sickening. Did you actually think for a moment that I wouldn't catch you? Someone would have heard or seen eventually, and it would have gotten to me," Ozai says coldly and Zuko tries to solidify his stance. "Did you actually think that you would ever escape reprimand for raping your sister?"

"That is ─ did she _tell you that_?" Zuko exclaims, not caring if it looks as if he is protesting too much.

"No. I think her silence for the past hour speaks louder than words." Ozai gestures loosely at Azula before stepping slightly closer to his disgrace of a son.

Zuko looks at her, stares at her imploringly, because she _does_ have the power to prevent what their father will do next. She probably likes that. And, of course, as Zuko should have expected, she just averts her eyes. Zuko had thought so many times that maybe Azula just didn't know how to express love; it was not as if Zuko knew how to do it either. He had sometimes thought, as she fell asleep with him instead of silently leaving, that it was the only thing she _thought_ was love.

On the other hand, Azula loves nothing but herself. And Zuko, by all means, should hate her.

"It was completely consensual. And... I..." Zuko rubs his face, his nails tearing at his own eyebrow. _This is a nightmare. This is a nightmare._

She started it, and Zuko, he knows he should have resisted and done the right thing. But he was in no mood to do the right thing in the middle of his existence. In a life where the only thing his father said upon his return was, _"You may be alive in my home, but until I die, you don't really exist."_

It is only because of _Ozai_ that sleeping with her was desirable. Or so Zuko tells himself.

"What you did," Ozai says clearly and Azula inhales sharply behind him. Zuko gives her the same look again, but of course she is too cold to respond. "Is very easily penalized by death. It pains me, but it has to be done."

"You've been looking for an excuse since I was born!"

That immediately destroys the disturbingly calm demeanor of the Fire Lord. "I don't think walking into my daughter's bedroom to find my son inside of her is a fabricated excuse!"

Zuko moves into a fighting stance as quickly as he can, knowing he is prompting retaliation, of course, but he also knows that his father will strike first if Zuko says another word he has on the tip of his tongue.

The fight lasts all of two seconds before a snapping sound echoes loudly through the room. Zuko stumbles backwards, nearly falling, and his father is nearly as disoriented by the lightning that strikes the space in the wall between them.

"He's telling the truth," says the last voice Zuko ever expected to defend him. "We all know who's going to win this. Zuko could be beaten by a toddler, father. There's no honor in it."

Ozai hesitates, taking a step back. He waits, examining Zuko for a moment. "As I seem to be the only person here able to control primal and sick urges, today's your lucky day."

And the room is silent.

* * *

Reasonably enough, the siblings are kept separated by their father for the remainder of the night, as he tries to come up with something brutal yet honorable to do to them. His stomach churns, and there is no way he will sleep as the image simply refuses to leave his eyes.

He cannot understand how this could have happened. How either of them could have such a _sick_ desire. It isn't... her fault, he tries to remind himself. Zuko was raised pitifully by a weak and indulgent man who probably encouraged such hedonism.

 _Ozai raised Azula properly._

She is leaning on the windowsill when he walks to find her, as he is no desire to look Zuko in the eye again for as long as he lives.

"Tell me what happened. Tell me how much you did with him," Ozai demands quietly, and somehow, his soft commands are more intimidating than rage.

Azula looks away for a moment. "More than I should have."

"I have no idea why either of you would have such perverse proclivities." Ozai pauses. "But you would gladly let him take the fall, I'm sure. Haven't you always wanted to be an only child? It's doesn't matter right now if you were involved or chose to be with him; if you value your reputation, I'm sure you're content lying... I don't know where he would get a disgusting urge like that.

"Perhaps it's inherited," Azula replies sharply as their eyes lock. "I don't intend to lie about being victimized by _Zuko_. I refuse to play the part of a weak, exploited young girl just to make you feel better about your parenting."

Princess Azula regrets it instantly.

"Then you'll suffer with him. It's only fair."

* * *

Azula and Zuko are as spaced out as they can be as they kneel before the glowing orange throne. They do not want to be close to each other, even though they did share those moments. Play fighting, sparring, Azula mocking her brother and his scar, Zuko snarling at her and watching her lips twist into that evil smirk. The twisted mind that a pretty face can hide, well, Zuko learned about it the hard way with his sister.

 _And now he has destroyed his life for her, because he thought that they shared a bond._

 _He thought that after losing their mother, despite being further apart, they had the potential to be close._

 _He thought that Azula's gradual acknowledgment of his existence, her gradual lack of genuine scathing wickedness and pleasure about Zuko being locked up forever, led her to act._

Azula, well, she knows why she did it, but she cannot admit it to herself. It is not the type of thing that the remorseless, calculated and powerful Princess Azula would do. She would not start to squirm at her father's abuse of her brother, she would not start to wonder if what she had been told by her father about Zuko was wrong. And her confusion, her pain and her confusion, led her to him.

Her eyes fixate on her father briefly. _You forced me into his arms, even if you didn't intend it_ , her gaze says, but he either does not see it, or ignores it.

"Do you know what the usual required course of action for extramarital sex between nobles is?" Ozai inquires and, admittedly, neither of them do. "Marriage, of course. If you're going to take that from her, you have to follow through, because I honestly don't think that you can handle any more shame and disgrace, Zuko. And, I can't imagine anyone else wanting you now, Azula."

They are shocked. Too shocked.

"You both want to rule the country, in the end," Ozai continues, looking entertained by his deplorable decision for punishment. "It certainly saves me negotiating difficult contracts. And it is the honorable way to deal with these disgraceful actions. I intended to dispose of one of you to keep this from happening, but I think you will better learn through this."

And there is nothing, nothing Zuko or Azula can think to say in response.

* * *

Azula and Zuko are both very shaken after their father's reaction and completely insane punishment for them. Of course, they suppose, they could not have expected anything _less_ barbaric and sadistic from him. He burnt his son's face and banished him for speaking out in a war meeting; of course his reaction will be more visceral and violent to finding out his children were _fucking each other_.

But his response seems so... counterintuitive. If their incestuous desires are what _angered_ him, then why would he want to confirm them? Why would he want to force marriage?

"Maybe it's a test," Zuko remarks quietly, looking up at his sister. She looks venomous and ready to kill, but he knows they will only find a way out of this fate if they work together, as difficult as that may be.

"A test?" Azula scoffs and crosses her arms, elbows pressing against her breasts.

" _Yes_. Maybe he's just trying to scare us," Zuko suggests and Azula envies his naivety.

"I doubt that. But I _do_ think we might be able to get out of it," she says clearly, clearing her sore throat.

"How?" Zuko asks, studying her closely.

"This has to be illegal," Azula insists, still looking breathless. "Right? There's no way an incestuous marriage is _legal_.

Zuko licks his lower lip, thinking that perhaps she has a point. It is taboo enough that he doubts society has ever supported such a thing.

"There are a lot of books on the Royal Family law here, right?" he suggests, looking down the hallway towards one of the dusty libraries.

Azula nods and they both quickly rise to go search for an escape route.

Unfortunately enough, the Royal Family has had a lengthy and detailed history of _exclusively_ incestuous marriages. Wonderful. Azula does find mentions of them being discouraged after mishaps and murders, but they were always popularized during times of war.

Although it seems to have become taboo over time, she thinks that Ozai could easily get away with its legitimacy by the four hundred years of married siblings.

"We might have some legal standing if we point out the regulations over the past few decades but..."

Zuko just grimaces. "But it's not looking too optimistic?"

"No," Azula sighs before slumping into a chair and rubbing her temples. Her headache is splitting, her heart pounding in her throat.

After what she did during the Comet, she is _deserving_ of the capability to have a _say_ in her marriage. And then she had to fuck it up because of her _fucking_ control issues and the desire to dominate her stupid brother. Not to mention _defending_ him. She probably should have just cried to her father about how she didn't know it was wrong and he would simply finish off Zuko and make Azula's life _much_ easier.

But she slipped up, and now she will pay.

 _How_ she is going to explain this to her girlfriend is...

Probably not as bad of a situation as Zuko has gotten himself into. He, as the male and older sibling, will likely take most of the blame. Even if he is such a _wimp_. Azula stood up for him because she knew he would be blamed because of his gender, his age and his past exile. As she watched Ozai and Zuko fight, her mind very calmly told her that it would be illogical to put a stop to it. She told herself that her life was more important, and she should say whatever lies Ozai will put into her mouth.

But her gut, whatever she has in place of a heart even, was too strong for her to stop. She acted on impulse, yet again.

"It'll be okay," Zuko says, reaching to touch her. She bats his hand away and stands, quickly striding away to try to think of a way to fix her problem on her own. "Fine. If you want to be that way, see if I care. You're his little golden child anyway."

"And you are a sad, jealous little man. I wonder, when was it that you looked at father and saw that there was no more love for you in his eyes," Azula purrs, advancing on him. "Or was there never any of it from the start?"

His fists clench, but he eases and takes a deep breath. Zuko does not need any more trouble for the rest of his life.

She grits her teeth, remembering what her father told her about Zuko over and over again. Those lies she believed as gospel until Zuko came home and she began to question all she knew. But her father was right to try to pit her against her brother.

Because _everything_ wrong in her life is because of _him_.

Zuko stares after her, thinking exactly the same thing.

But both of them? They are just too afraid to admit that their crimes might have come from a place of love. They are just too afraid of expressing any feeling but hatred or detachment.

This is a mess.


	2. Chapter 2

"If you have come here to try to change my mind, you're wasting your time," says Ozai without even looking up. He could recognize her footsteps easily. They are distinguishable, like _she_ is distinguishable.

The Fire Lord is in his study, a rather dim, dusty room decorated with archaic spoils of war. Scrolls are tucked here and there; it is a mess. Azula has often imagined cleaning it thoroughly and organizing it to perfection. As well as perhaps attempting to _read_ some of the scrolls there, instead of just letting them fall into decay.

She has always dreamt of being Fire Lord, ever since her father told her about it when she was a little girl. And now she wonders where that future even is, or _what_ her future may hold. Azula plans things, she likes everything to be _perfect_ , and now her messy mistake of a few hot nights with the worst choice in sexual partners is going to destroy her perfect world.

Ignoring her father's attempt to be rid of her, "It's always worth a try," Azula says lightly and he refuses to look up. He is _incapable_ of looking at her, he thinks. "Discuss this with me, father. I have only ever been the perfect daughter."

"The perfect daughter would've been smart and agreed to cooperate with me, and admit what he did to you," Ozai says flatly, not looking up from whatever long report he is jotting notes in the margins of.

Azula tries not to let her anger show. "I won't have him executed."

"Do you love him?" Ozai laughs at that, and Azula shakes her head slowly. She is uncertain about her feelings for Zuko, but she is certain of what her father wants to hear from her.

"I wouldn't have _any_ innocent person executed for a crime they didn't commit. There is a distinct difference between being comfortably able to tighten the noose on whoever I must, regardless of those human emotions I sacrificed for my royalty, and being the kind of person who has people killed just because they feel like it," Azula states regally, deciding to put her best political spin onto it.

"Those ideology textbooks are just sweet lies that little children read when they dream of being saviors. You're no savior." Ozai cannot laugh this time, but his tone is just as mocking as before.

"Neither are..." Azula decides against insulting or provoking her father, as much as she would like to.

"I have been so much to you. I have _given_ so much to you. And I knew allowing Zuko to return home was ridiculous of me. I did not, however, think the problem would be my children... doing... _that_." He is still so _repulsed_ , the hypocrite. Azula tries to keep from chewing through her mouth.

"You have every right to be disgusted. I would be disgusted, I suppose," Azula attempts sweetly, although she doubts she will ever be able to pull of _innocence_ again in her father's eyes. "Wedding us for that is barbaric, and you know it."

"It's well within my rights."

"But that doesn't make it right."

"Your morality only serves you, and I won't conform to it. This will really be for the best. Think about it for a moment. Think about the advantage you have as a leader now. And it all it took was such sick perversion and disobedience. You're being rewarded for being a disappointment. Don't push me to make this worse than it is." Ozai taught her better than this. Ozai taught her not to even understand _morality_ , because she was a sword. An extension of his brutal hand, and she was never meant to be more than that.

"I would be a better leader if I weren't ─ "

Ozai cannot mask his rage at that indignant statement. "Permanently exiled? Married to someone else to cover it all up? Brutalized or punished or publicly shamed for your actions? I am a very kind and understanding man for you. I would not have been so kind if it were only Zuko involved."

"I know, father," Azula is forced to say. She knows she has made no leeway with him, but she thinks she still can persuade him. Azula's persuasiveness is even more powerful than her bright blue bending, and she had her father neatly under her thumb before _Zuko had to come home_ and complicate everything.

Father lashes out at Zuko because he reminds him of mother. Zuko lashes out at father for the same reason. Their loathing makes a once very meticulously balanced and isolated palace into a minefield that even the boldest soldiers would sweat looking at.

It was no surprise that, Azula, caught in between, would find herself in someone's bed.

Zuko did...

Make himself a bit irresistible.

"I'm sure you did that with him specifically to anger me. Did you want to be found?"

"Of course not. I ─ I would never..."

"You are really wasting your breath, my dear. Take this with grace and honor and I'm sure things will work out in your favor. You can even keep that sweet girl who was bound to just wind up a mistress or royal whore anyway. It's not like you're missing out."

Azula has a flicker of a desire to strike him down with lightning for his callous remarks about Ty Lee, but she is smarter than that. And she does not care enough about her brother or her girlfriend to sacrifice her political ambitions.

Remembering said ambitions, Azula adopts the voice of the naive yet ambitious young woman hoping only for her father's love. That girl died long ago, but Azula can still pretend. "Will you actually speak with me about this father?"

Ozai sighs, and contemplates it briefly. He will have to justify this decision to a multitude of people, and mostly to himself.

"For me, this is a nice, neat and tidy way to clear up several problems. For you, it is an opportunity that I will allow you to unravel on your own. For him, I suppose it's just mixing business and pleasure."

"Insinuating that I do not enjoy sleeping with him," snaps Azula, forgetting her facade and wanting to slap herself for it.

"It would be best if you also insinuated that," Ozai says coolly, and Azula knows that this conversation is over.

She bows politely, fighting the urge to spit in his face, and leaves. With a short, angry sigh, she forces her way into the halls and burns the first potted plant that dares to be in her path. The room is bright blue, before receding, and the smoke burns her nostrils in a pleasing way.

But it still does not ease her frustration at this situation.

Forced marriages because of a loss of virginity is the most archaic...

Azula did not think the Fire Nation would _ever_ be so backwards as to support such a thing...

Even then old, stodgy noble houses do not care about that anymore...

* * *

"The gala tomorrow will announce your engagement," Ozai says to his children after leaving them to their own dinner. He has no appetite while looking at them. "I'm sure you're excited."

He walks away in silence.

* * *

"What?" Mai asks as quietly and as calmly as possible, her expression empty but her insides writhing in panic. Zuko is rubbing his face and refusing to look at her, his body wracked and tormented with shame. "What do you mean your father is making you marry your sister?" And Mai stops and thinks for a moment. "What do you mean you've been _fucking_ your sister?"

"It's just... _please_ let me explain," Zuko begs, sitting down beside her. She had already taken a seat when Zuko decided to lay _that_ news onto her.

"I would appreciate an explanation," Mai says quietly and Zuko frowns. He feels like he has betrayed her _so much_. The fact that he has slept with her as well just makes it worse, just makes it feel like an even more abhorrent act that he partook in with Azula.

And now he is paying for it.

They are in Mai's house, both feeling very uncomfortable. Zuko struggled to escape the palace, given the scrutiny from his father, but he somehow managed, and he also somehow managed to tell Mai what he had done. But, despite his valiant efforts, he does not deserve a parade.

"It just _happened_ ," Zuko says and Mai stares, that answer not good enough for her. "I don't know what..." Zuko groans and rubs his face and tries to rethink his story. "Okay, alright..."

* * *

 _Zuko comes home in disgrace. He was supposed to be victorious; he was supposed to have captured the Avatar. But the Avatar is clearly long gone, and the Fire Nation has won the war anyway. His father allowed him to come home in an act of charity after Sozin's Comet._

 _Ozai does not speak to his son much, and Iroh is forced to accept work on the other side of the Fire Nation. Zuko's parting words with his Uncle are so painful, and they make it clear that Iroh had the choice between leaving and some far worse fate._

 _Azula has not changed, Zuko notices as he tries to find some way to fit in. She is still the cruel girl she always was, but, now she has something strange about her eyes. There is nothing human left in them. Even if she smiles at her playful insults, they are still so empty. So impossibly empty._

 _Zuko builds a relationship with his sister, and she eventually does not mind it. She does not seem to have much in her life, and Zuko has nothing. Therefore, they are a perfect fit._

 _"Do you think," Zuko asks on the day when everything changes, "Do you think our family will ever go back to being happy? Like we were?"_

 _Azula hesitates momentarily before replying, "What family are you even talking about? Of course we won't be like that again."_

 _They say nothing, looking at tiles in front of them. Azula suddenly brushes all of the game pieces off of the table and Zuko recoils, moving his hands to defend himself._

 _"This is so pointless. I should be doing something more important," Azula says sharply, and Zuko is baffled by her actions. She leaps up and starts to walk away when he grabs her wrist._

 _She moves to punch him, her fist lit in bright blue, but something else collides with Zuko's face._

 _Her lips against his lips._

 _Zuko's stomach lurches._

* * *

Meanwhile, Azula and her own love interest are in the palace courtyard.

"Zuko went to Mai's house. He's there a lot," Ty Lee says and then is stunned by Azula's shocked and livid expression.

The princess stands up and Ty Lee gives her a quizzical glance. She does not understand what she has said to upset her.

In her anger, Azula dispels countless balls of blue fire directly into the stone walls of the courtyard. It does nothing; it is so far from satisfying, but she refuses to relent until she feels _some_ kind of release. Her anger is simmering within her, bubbling and bursting within every cell in her body.

 _How dare he tell Mai?_

 _Well, it isn't as if she would never find out if father follows through with his insane plot._

"Azula, what's wrong?" Ty Lee asks, standing up against her better judgment. "Azula!"

The princess does not turn around, but she does stop the ceaseless firebending.

"You'll find out at the gala tomorrow," Azula says coolly as she turns around to face Ty Lee. She looks at her, the rage instead of her still simmering to a boil.

Ty Lee steps forward and kisses Azula as gently as she can.

Oh, it only hurts when Azula laughs. The party tomorrow will be _so interesting_ for the guests, won't it?

* * *

 _Azula kisses Zuko and her eyes widen in shock._

 _She cannot, she does not know why she did that. She does not know why she is so_ confused _when she is around him._

 _He stares at her, agape. Azula just stares back._

 _There are no words to say._


	3. Chapter 3

Azula does enjoy getting ready for the gala, being waited on.

She likes being made even more stunning than she already is, even more irresistible than she already is. But her thoughts are distant and troubled as her nails are painted and her hair washed. It is not how she imagined her wedding, certainly. She tried not to think much about it, because she was involved with someone she could never marry.

Mai's parents will probably be livid about the breach of their contract, that is, if Mai is not disgusted by both Zuko and Azula. Ty Lee will probably still cling to Azula; the princess doubts she would abandon her over even something as taboo as incest.

Marrying your sibling is an archaic tradition that faded away for a _reason_.

The only benefit is perhaps Azula and her brother being able to have joint control over the Fire Nation. Or the fact that at least Zuko is a known, despite their extremely turbulent past.

"Azula," says a voice and the princess looks up from her far-off thoughts. It's Zuko; somehow Azula doubts that he has father's permission to be here. "I want to talk to you."

"Go right ahead," Azula says coldly and he examines her for a moment, as if sizing up what her reaction will be.

"Why did you defend me? I didn't think you would be bothered by having me killed to spare yourself," Zuko replies and Azula takes a sharp breath, as if she has been jabbed in the ribs. "It isn't as if you're just too honest and selfless to let me die."

Azula clenches her jaw as she wonders what the proper answer is. The truth is, she does not quite understand why she felt the impulse to stand up for Zuko, and not to stand down when her father offered her an easy out. She is even more uncertain why she felt the impulse to go to bed with him.

Save for how he was with her. How he would listen, how she wanted to be present, how she felt as if she had control of the situation, without her brother having to relinquish his.

"Maybe I have something very nasty planned," Azula says and even Zuko is not gullible enough for those words. Still, she makes it clear that the conversation is over before it began, and Zuko leaves before he attracts too much attention.

Zuko and Azula, once again, know how much easier violence and sex and detached facades are than admitting compassion.

* * *

The gala is beautiful and stunning, despite being put together on a moment's notice. Azula glances occasionally at her brother, trying to find the words to eventually say. If this is announced, if father is telling the truth, Azula does not know what she will do. And the thought of not having a calculated, planned future is horrifying to her.

But despite her plans and her logical, cold mind telling her to let Zuko die for her to live and reign, the fire within her that she tries to keep cold, raged warm. And she defended him, throwing aside her plans and security, because something strange and unknown inside of her could not allow that to happen.

Azula greets Ty Lee with a kiss on the cheek, brushing past her lips and avoiding them. The gala where she has her engagement announced is not the best place to be seen with someone else romantically.

Mai is not present, and Azula has not heard from her. She feels her throat constricting as she starts to think of even more possible damages of her relationship with Zuko.

 _Azula visits her brother before she goes to win the war with the power of the Comet. He is slumped in his prison that once was his childhood home. But Azula does not pity him. Ozai whispered things into her ear about her brother._

 _And she used to envy him despite her superiority in all things. He got to travel the world, and Azula endured the pain of being molded into Ozai's beloved legacy._

 _"I don't need this," Zuko says through a clenched jaw._

"You don't look happy," Ty Lee says softly to Azula.

"I am not happy," Azula replies, not knowing what else to say to that. "This is not a happy occasion, despite the bright colors and fancy drinks."

Ty Lee looks very concerned as Zuko comes to sit down. Azula glances at him before quickly turning her head away.

Zuko does not know why she is suddenly so averse to him. She is not the type of person to feel any shame, and she is the _lucky one_. Zuko is the one father hates and wants to punish. He would never hurt her, because _everyone loves her_.

She always has been understandably hot and cold about their relationship.

But now they are stuck committing, and the announcement is taken with silence before it sinks in and everyone realizes that they must pretend not to be unnerved.

Azula escapes the party after the third time someone congratulates her.

Congratulates her on disappointing and angering her father so much that he wants to punish her with the same strength and lack of restraint as he did to _Zuko_.

But perhaps worse, because Zuko was just about his anger and resentment. Azula is about control to him, and what better way to control her than with her body?

* * *

Azula has been outside for some time when Zuko joins her, looking unnerved. She purses her lips bitterly, because he seems to still think it is all about him, and that he has no grasp on this situation.

And so both Zuko and Azula stand outside, the cool air comfortable after being in the hot room. They say nothing for a long while, because nothing needs to be said. And then Zuko takes a deep breath.

"I don't hate you. It was easy to hate you instead of father, and, admittedly, you make yourself pretty easy to hate. But I don't... regret any of this," Zuko says, his heart pounding with the bravery it takes to voice it.

Azula is silent for enough time to make Zuko's mouth dry. "I don't either. The night I initiated our liaisons was one where I had suffered. I went to your room without the intention of trying to bed you. I went to your room because I had decided I understood things that I didn't before. But I didn't say them, so I took off my clothes."

Zuko contemplates that for a moment. He thinks of all of the words he decided he could not say, because he was so unsure of who Azula was. So he neglected what he should have said, and instead indulged in their acts of pleasure and passion.

"But you came back. There was obviously something there for you," Zuko says and Azula looks briefly angry, before resuming her cold face.

"You don't know me. Don't pretend to. It isn't as if we've ever had a real conversation before. We went from fighting little children, to very different adults who wanted to forget the other. You do not know me."

"Just, I... I know this is belated," Zuko says slowly, "but I would like to get to know you. I never really got the chance, or, err, _wanted_ to know anything about you in the first place. I don't know you, but I want to."

Azula's lips move, and Zuko thinks that perhaps she will allow herself to be vulnerable for at least a few seconds. But the moment fades, and Azula quickly retreats from it.

"Well, now we certainly have plenty of time to get to know each other. It only took being forced to get married for you to even think for a moment about knowing me as anything but the embodiment of everything in your pathetic life that went _wrong_. Because I am just so fortunate that this punishment couldn't at _all_ be directed at me. Only at poor, victimized Prince Zuko."

She walks away before he can protest.

* * *

The next morning, Azula goes to find Mai, and Ty Lee decides to hang onto her. All Azula can think is that she is grateful Ty Lee's loyalty has not wavered upon the revelations of late. Perhaps she would not mind at all being a royal mistress, if Azula were to somehow earn it.

Mai answers the door, not one of her servants, as usual. She must have seen Azula and Ty Lee coming, because she silently nods towards the stairs, and the three best friends clamber up them. Once they are alone in Mai's room, she just stares at them briefly.

"I'm not happy," Mai finally says.

"You're never happy," Ty Lee remarks before glancing at Azula and Mai and grimacing. This seems very serious.

Azula hesitates, trying to find the best possible answer.

"I made my choice. And you should be grateful that he is alive, and that I am accepting my father's wrath for him. I could have so easily let him die," Azula says coldly.

Mai purses her lips.

This is not a comfortable morning for anyone.

* * *

As Azula is with Mai and Ty Lee, Zuko lies about where he is going. He receives permission to go purchase new ink and brushes for his hobby of traditional painting, a hobby which he picked up not out of love or desire for it, but because it was so innocuous and helped maintain the illusion that he was no threat to his father.

"Hello, Uncle," Zuko says quietly.

"You should not be here." Here, in a fancy prison disguised as a nice place to live. An imprisonment. He surrendered to for reasons. Zuko still doesn't understand even three years after the Comet.

It was supposedly such an act of mercy, and clearly Iroh must have had reasons behind surrendering to his brother instead of challenging him. Yes, Zuko knew Uncle had become a pacifist instead of the ruthless soldier he once was, but Zuko also expected for him to stand up for the right thing.

"I need to talk to you. How much news do you get?" Zuko asks cautiously. He has been here twice before, but he has never needed Iroh as much as he does now.

The retired general rubs his face. He looks tired, very tired, and his wrinkles are much more prominent.

"Of course I have heard you are engaged to be married. But the reasons behind your father's decision are a mystery to me. Not only because those old traditions are, well, _old traditions_ , but because I could not imagine him restoring your status of royalty permanently without reason," Iroh says and Zuko thinks he must truly not know.

Well, of _course_ he wouldn't know. It isn't like it is something anyone was shouting from the rooftops.

"I don't know." Zuko averts his eyes, and then he sighs from the need to be honest. "I had been... I had been... sleeping with her and he found out about it."

Iroh tries not to look at Zuko, and the prince feels weak and sick from that reaction. But Zuko supposes he could not have expected any _other_ reaction save for disgust.

 _I just slept with her last night,_ Zuko thinks, but he contains that inside of him.

"He did not have you killed?" Iroh asks quietly.

Zuko appreciates his uncle not asking _why_ , because Zuko still does not know why.

"She intervened," Zuko admits. "That's another reason why I'm so confused. It's been two years and our relationship was _weird_ even before it got so out of control. I don't know what happened but we did come to a mutual understanding that we had a common enemy. But we were raised in isolation from each other and I don't..."

Zuko trails off. He does not know what more he can say. Just that he is so, _so_ confused and never knows what to expect from his father or sister.

"I cannot, I cannot say I condone what you have done, but you have done it and it is in the past now."

"And it seems like it's in the future too! The-the, just think about, I can't imagine going through with this. We'll have to have _children_ at some point!" Zuko realizes he is standing and clutching the table and he sits down, although that does not make him any less angry.

"I believe that it is a display of power. Or perhaps the fact that his actions have been very drastic." Iroh hesitates for a moment. "I do not think Azula is unscathed in this, and I am sure she has not had as much of an easy life as you accuse her of. Perhaps he is directing this at her, and using you."

Zuko had not thought about that. He had not _realized_ that his father seemed to get the idea the moment Azula stood up and defied him by defending Zuko.

Because Zuko knows that his father would have no qualms about using Zuko as nothing but a tool, or a weapon. He looks at Iroh, and says quietly, "I have to go."

Uncle nods. Iroh does not understand what his nephew has done, but he does believe that Zuko can eventually make it right.

* * *

Zuko finds his sister, of course, in the training room of the palace.

Azula has lightning on her fingertips when Zuko hesitantly approaches her. She does not notice him at first, her eyes focused and her body under complete control. Zuko does not think he will ever get the chance to learn.

She releases it with the sound of a sudden storm, and turns to face her brother.

"What do you want?" she asks and he reconsiders his desire to walk closer to her. She does not look well at all.

"I just had a kind of realization," Zuko says weakly. "This isn't about me at all, is it?"

"Not everything is about you. It's about time you realized that, even if it took you eighteen years." She smirks and he rolls his eyes.

He cannot believe that insult came from the lips of the most narcissistic person he has ever encountered.

"I mean that this is about you defying him, and I'm..." Zuko rubs his neck. He hates this, he hates _apologizing_ to her, admitting weakness and hoping she won't smell blood and tear him to shreds. "I'm sorry. Because you stood up for me and that's why he's forcing you to do this."

Azula's eyes drift around the cold, dusty training room, looking for anything to gaze at other than her brother.

"It's about time. You're just lucky because now you have purpose to father. I suppose this is better than exile and mutilation." Azula shrugs and returns to her training.

Zuko grabs her arm and she nearly burns his face before stopping just short. She does not like to be grabbed like that, but she manages to calm down enough to look him in the eye.

"You don't feel anything? You're not angry or sad or scared about this?"

"I'm not going to bawl and grovel about my punishment for insolence and disrespect," Azula spits and he tosses her backwards, knowing she will catch herself.

They break into a fight. Both throwing all of themselves into it, into blue and red colliding and exploding and bursting. It is the release and loathing between them. But also the fear, the incredible fear of the abyss they both stand at the precipice of.

Azula grabs Zuko's arm and twists it, putting out his attack and moving to throw him to the ground. But she changes her mind halfway through and kissing him on the lips. Zuko finds the transition strangely natural as he puts his hand behind her back and holds her there.

She lets him press her against the wall, _guides him_ to do it, perhaps. Their lips collide again and again and again, and it fills Azula with the burning passion that makes her forget everything but this. There is a brief, breathless break between them as Zuko removes his shirt and tosses it to the cold stone floor. She undoes her clothes more quickly, and as he is back against her, she wraps her legs around his waist.

 _Yes,_ this is what she wants. This is what she wants and she always gets what she wants.

His lips move to her neck, sucking on the skin there, listening to her moan. She wants him right now more than she has ever wanted anything. Sex was about wanting it to be over before this; now it is about wanting it to last forever.

But as he enters her and her back slides and scrapes against the wall, the force between them overwhelming her senses, she is pretending that an eternity is a real concept.

She thinks she can delay time for a little while, though, as they slide together to the floor without stopping the relentless rhythm.


	4. Chapter 4

Princess Azula looks like she is at a funeral.

But who doesn't on their wedding day? Most people, actually. Most people are happy, even though most to all marriages are arranged. It is not usually because the bond is exciting, but because the event is thrilling and everyone is radiating joy for the couple.

No one, however, is very happy about the wedding coming this afternoon.

Azula has requested for Ty Lee to help her get ready, after snapping while being cared for by servants. They were too much, too overwhelming, _and_ Azula cannot bear to have her underlings see how weak she feels right now.

Ty Lee, on the other hand, has seen Azula at her worst, and tends to be somewhat soothing.

"Please try to look kind of happy. It's flattering," says the equally sad girl grooming Azula. "I mean, this is the best day of your life, right?"

Azula just keeps staring at the mirror. Because Ty Lee does not feel the same way, and Azula has no idea why she is even still around. It is not that she has no appreciation for Ty Lee not bolting out of the door and changing her name once she found out about Zuko. It is that… she hoped for a more evident reaction.

The wedding has been so rushed that Azula has heard whispers asking if she is _showing_ or not. She thought Fire Lord Ozai would have drawn it out for as long as possible in order to coerce Azula into changing her mind and begging him for mercy.

She has made up her mind, and she is going to follow through. It is not as if no one in her family hasn't ever wed their brother before. Sozin's parents were siblings, as were several beforehand, a handful of cousins...

There was once the belief that the fire in the royal blood was only carried through female heirs, since the legend was that the first person to control the dragons was a woman, and the royals all are descended from her.

Apparently the first waterbender after the moon was also a woman, which explains a certain natural phenomenon of the female body. Azula has no idea if the Water Tribes have ever faced this, but she has no desire to base her life on those of savages.

Ty Lee tugs at her hair too hard and she is torn from her pulsating thoughts.

"You know that it's way, way better than marrying some strange old guy, right?" Ty Lee says sweetly and Azula has no response. She still looks as grim as ever. "You know Zuko. You've... slept with him. He understands you."

Azula shakes her head. " _No_ , no, he will never understand me. And he has never tried."

Ty Lee hesitates. "But he has been through so much that you have. You two have shared so much that... that maybe it won't be so bad after all."

"Be my mistress." Azula is blunt about that thought, overly blunt about it because she has had the thought on her mind for the past two weeks of preparation for a rushed wedding.

 _Of course_ is the answer Azula was expecting. But Ty Lee looks very stunned by it. She does not drop Azula's hair as she stares into the mirror, her eyes glimmering.

"I would like that," Ty Lee says quietly and Azula thinks she might be lying. Azula thinks she might not have a choice. "For the right price, of course." Those words are teasing and playful, but they are also honest. Azula can tell.

"I'll see what I can do," Azula responds in the same tone, and with the same guised truthfulness.

Ty Lee goes back to Azula's hair and thinking intently about _something_ to make her feel better about marrying Zuko. She is definitely coming up short.

"You both will run the country?" Ty Lee asks, hoping the answer is yes.

"Of course. But mostly me," Azula replies, and it is not consoling because she _knew_ that she would have the throne eventually. She did not need to marry Zuko in order to get it.

"But you'll have some extra time if Zuko is helping you," Ty Lee chimes too loudly, too hopefully.

Azula is unimpressed. "I know. There are just not enough hours in the day for all of the incest, genocide orders and clandestine murders."

"I will always be here, you know?"

"Because you're crazy. I have no idea how you can look at my relationship with him and not quickly look away and make an excuse to leave," Azula says bitterly and Ty Lee furrows her brow.

"Because you and Zuko are both my friends. And _you_ are more than my friend." Ty Lee does hesitate, revealing that, yes, she has felt the disgust as well.

And Azula wants so desperately to regret what she did. She wants to feel genuine remorse for deciding to take pity on Zuko and spend time with him after the return from his exile. She wants to revoke the fact that she started to enjoy his company. She wants to blame herself for the fact that she took him to bed out of her own pain and tried to use him to heal it like a haphazard bandage.

But she has no regrets. Not a single one.

Regrets are beneath her, yes. She was trained to be cold, calculated and clinical. Regrets are for lesser souls.

However, it would be very nice to attribute this horrible situation to a mistake that she wishes she had not made.

"I really love you, and I think you love your brother," Ty Lee says warmly.

Azula just scoffs and continues staring blankly into the shiny mirror.

Ty Lee frowns and closes her eyes, realizing that she is completely unable to help Azula. So she just finishes beautifying her, and hopes that Azula will maybe smile while walking down the aisle. Likely however, she will not, and Ty Lee has accepted that.

It is time now, for a wedding that feels like a funeral march.


	5. Chapter 5

It is possibly the most lachrymose dance anyone in the room has ever seen.

But Azula and Zuko are determined to look like it is not a punishment. They have agreed not to let him win; they always have.

 _"It's so nice to see you, ZuZu," is the first thing Azula says when he is forced to come home. Her lips are gnarled into a satisfied and smug smirk, like a lion-tiger that has just caught a particularly juicy prey. "I'm glad you're home. Our house just feels so cold without you."_

 _Zuko looks at her, wanting to say something virulently angry, but he just gives her a single glance and is gone to the room where he intends to hide from the world that has betrayed him time and time again._

Zuko readjusts his hand on her back and she is not quite sure what to make of the electric sensation that it sends pounding through her veins. But still, the dance goes on, now hidden from sight by other, happier people.

"We could stop," he says into her ear and she hesitates for a moment.

"No. I would prefer staying away from well-wishers for as long as possible. Just look irrevocably in love with me."

"I think that might be disturbing to some people."

"I am _well_ aware of that. Why else would I suggest it? No one is going to want to go anywhere near siblings who are actually in love and not just married to settle a bloodline dispute."

Zuko laughs mirthlessly, and nearly silent at Azula's comment on how their father explained the marriage between his two children. That, because Zuko was disgraced, he had possibly lost the right to the throne to his more adept sister. But since he was born first, there could be strong complications with heirs.

It seems ridiculous to both of them, but no one has questioned it.

(Probably because if anyone questioned it, they would disappear.)

(But, hush, the Fire Nation would never openly admit that their beloved and deity-esque leader is the type who would force his children to wed and produce children with each other solely out of vengeance.)

"This music is horrible," Azula says quietly as she spins, wrinkling her nose in disgust.

Zuko quietly scoffs, and remarks, "You are never happy."

"Neither are you. When have you ever been happy?" Azula cocks an incredibly questioning eyebrow.

"That's... a fair point. But I'm unhappy because life has screwed me over. When's the last time you genuinely got kicked into the dirt by the Universe," Zuko hisses in her ear again and she bites her lip and restrains herself from starting an Agni Kai in the middle of a wedding reception.

"Wouldn't you prefer it if we just fought it out to settle the bloodline dispute?" Azula opts to purr instead.

Zuko does not respond, and he is probably right not to provoke her further.

 _Years ago, Azula drums her fingers on the table and cannot help but feel moderately sick as she studies. The tutors she has suffered through endlessly are giving her lessons on being Fire Lord. She has always wanted to the throne, and being crown princess is the best gift she could ask for._

 _But achieving your dreams does come with a cost._

 _This cost is not one she is proud of having to pay, even though she tries to justify if by fanning the flames of loathing towards her brother._

 _Azula cannot quite understand why she was ever so jealous of Zuko. Neither of them got their happy ending, not for a second. They both were used, they both went through the wringer in ways that only the other could possibly understand._

 _She makes a decision that changes more than she would like to change that evening, after her mind strayed in lessons about things she has always known. Azula has always controlled and tamed any inner pain or turmoil; that is how she has already mastered lightning years ago._

 _However, the facade can grow so exhausting. Because inside, she is constantly breaking. When she is alone she does not know how to control herself as she succumbs to this inner, hurt and worn self. And maybe Zuko did not get so much better off while on his adventures with Uncle._

 _She knocks on his door and he calls carelessly, "It's open."_

 _Azula walks in and Zuko was not expecting her._

 _"I was," Azula begins before making a repulsed face, "I was thinking that you must be very lonely in here with no one who ever wants to talk to you."_

 _"Ugh."_

 _But Zuko does not protest. Because he is at the sour point where even Azula's company is better than no company._

Eventually, they come to the point where they cannot continue hiding from the fact that this is their party. Zuko looks at Azula with envy for having been to so many of these lavish events while he was languishing; Azula looks at Zuko with envy for never having to navigate these horrid social events.

"So, do you have a wonderful speech about how I took pity on you and played some board games with my dear brother, and, wow, next thing you know, we're fucking each other," Azula whispers under her breath as their table is quite engrossed in the beauty queen soon to be courtesan of Princess Azula.

She is quite animated, while Azula is a much better public speaker, and has more charisma. Friendly people, however, tend to go almost as far in life as people with limitless ambition. Ty Lee is the former, Azula is the latter, and Zuko is neither.

"No. I have a scripted one."

"So do I," Azula says with a small smirk. "But that doesn't mean you can't just make up your own and neglect the piece of paper. It reminds me of a bill of sale for slaves."

She laughs again at her own comment and Zuko has no idea what to make of it, nor what to make of her in the first place.

He just knows that it is just magnificently grand that he is marrying Azula. And that they will have children together and he will be married to his sister until the day his die and...

His chest does tighten with panic.

It is really only now that the situation truly sets in and begins to suffocate him.

"Take a breath before you pass out," Azula says sweetly and he has no idea how she can deal with her punishment with such pretty grace.

Then again, every time she feigns happiness, she glances up at their father and the flickers of displeasure in his eyes.

 _Oh, yes_.

* * *

"Well, I'd rather be marrying you than a variety of other people," Azula decides to say as she walks through the cold and damp night air with her shoes in her hand and her legs stumbling slightly.

He does not blame her in the slightest for wanting to be just a little out of it. Zuko catches her as she walks into a rock. Okay, maybe more than a little.

The party is over. Azula did not go off script in the very sterile lines, but she did speak in a way that implied things it most certainly should not of. Zuko was not remotely defiant, because he knows that, regardless of this being forced on Azula, his father sees her through a very rose tinted lens.

She is his perfect daughter. Zuko is his fuck-up of a son.

* * *

Azula is very glad to be alone. Well, alone with Zuko. But that might as well be alone, honestly. They are in a very pretty room together, isolated. Then again, they are not fully isolated, Azula has already counted every single person spying on them, outside of the strict looking guards.

"I really misunderstand his reasoning," Azula says as she sits with her back against bright crimson pillows. "If he hates the idea that we were fucking each other, right, why would he want to make it mandatory?"

Zuko shrugs. "You may or may not have noticed, but our father is insane."

Azula laughs too long at that and Zuko cringes.

"I can't do this tonight. You know that, don't you?"

"Nothing stopped you when it was illicit and could get you killed," Azula says in a tone that Zuko cannot quite understand.

"Yeah, but I feel super wrong about this. You are not okay," Zuko says and Azula clenches her jaw.

She cannot imagine that he even _dares_ to presume that she needs to be protected and cared for. It sickens her to the core, and burns her to the soul.

"Well, you're going to. It is absolutely my decision, seeing as this is my penance. You already got yours," Azula says quietly and Zuko closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. "I stuck this out. He kept demanding that I back out of the wedding and blame it all on you. But I didn't want to."

"That sounds like something you would do."

"Well, yes, of course. But I'm not going to let father control me like that. I am so tired of him and how much he thinks he owns me," Azula says and Zuko thinks it is the most human and vulnerable thing Azula has said in her entire life.

And she probably will not remember it in the morning.

* * *

That night, Zuko does cave in, even though he probably should not.

It is something he wants and he should be ashamed of the fact that, so long as he pretends his hand is forced, he doesn't feel guilty about it. But she does just kind of crawl on his lap without asking for permission, and set his hands on her.

Their lips miss several times, and this is certainly not the most glamorous and graceful night either has ever experience. But he doesn't care about that for a second with her grinding her hips against him.

They are quenching a thirst that should not be there. But, at least today it is expected of them. She removes her rosy hued reception dress and he does take her by the waist and turn over on top of her. Surge of regret; she has told him she does not like that a thousand times, and he didn't mean to do it.

She does not care or lividly end the sex, as she might of. It should trouble Zuko, but it doesn't.

Increasingly rougher, which only makes it better. She does moan, and her nails dig very deep into his back, which is almost a masochistic pleasure to him.

It is vibrant.

But when it is over, they are who they are again. And when Azula wakes up, she'll probably be sober, and this will be troubling again.

Azula sits up on her knees and Zuko has no idea what she is doing.

"I'm just kissing you. I'm not going to murder you... probably," Azula says and Zuko does not know what to say to that.

She does move in and do it, and Zuko realizes that they have never just kissed. It never was supposed to be romantic, even if it was definitely an expression of being confused, and not knowing what familial love was supposed to look like anyway.

He likes it, he thinks, even though in the morning it will be gone.

In the darkness, she lingers, her hand moving up her neck, moving towards his face and he grabs her by the wrist.

"Don't do that."

"I just let you _pound_ me and you won't let me touch your scar?" Azula demands airily, although her tone is very dangerous.

"I..."

Azula gets up, dresses herself and goes to sleep on the vacation home sofa.

Zuko is confused about why she would even want to do that in the first place.

If there is anything Azula hates, it is imperfections.


	6. Chapter 6

Azula wakes up on the sofa.

She has never slept in such an uncomfortable and undignified manner in her life, and she finds the cramps and sore bones frustrating. Yes, the sofa is plush, luxurious and worth more than most _homes_ , but that does not mean it is not beneath her.

Because it is.

And, as she rises, feeling her bones _pop, pop, pop_ with every stretch of her limbs, she sees that Zuko is fast asleep in bed. A large, comfortable bed draped in red silk sheets. He looks peaceful, while Azula is hung-over and cross.

The memories of last night are vague and fairly painful to access, but she does distinctly recall wanting no more than to simply touch her brother's scar and he would not _allow_ it. It was not an incredibly pleasant start to a marriage, although it was not bad either.

Azula comes to the conclusion that there is no good conclusion.

She walks onto the balcony and looks at the light pink sunrise over the mountains. It looks strangely calming, and would probably be best accented by chamomile tea. Over the desert, past the resort... it seems like a world very far away from the dreadful one that Azula is trapped in.

"You're unhappy," Zuko says and Azula rolls her eyes.

"Oh, my dear husband, I love how you state the obvious with such a tone of _discovery_ ," Azula purrs as she turns around and leans against the stone railing.

Zuko isn't sure whether to protest more to the _dear husband_ or to the insult itself, but he just sighs. He is in no position to argue with his sister, and he just doesn't want to do it. She must be still upset about last night, and he feels a pang of concern that his mistake and inability to stay true to his word are going to come back and bite him now.

"Did you not like last night?" Zuko asks weakly, feeling the fool for needing to ask.

Azula just shrugs dismissively. "What I can remember was fine."

"Why were you so drunk?" slips out of Zuko's mouth before he can stop himself.

"Because I _wanted to be_ , why else?" Azula snaps, her back arched and her face illuminated with the morning sunlight.

It does occur to Zuko, as he looks past her and out to the mountains, that they are right now isolated and alone. They might be able to enjoy themselves, or even work out the kinks in their relationship while they are allowed here. Away from father, away from Azula's powerlust or the watchful eyes of others.

"I," Zuko dares to suggest, "think that maybe we could use this time to get to know each other. I mean, we're stuck married and maybe it could be a good thing."

Azula just stares at him for a moment, her eyes puncturing his soul.

"Well, I would agree with you but then we would both be wrong," Azula replies coldly and Zuko sighs.

"Why are you so angry and impossible?" Zuko demands, now going off of the handle, as expected. "You could have given in to father and had me arrested and executed."

"Are you blaming me for this marriage?" snarls Azula, even though she knows that it takes two to have an illicit affair.

"No, I just mean that maybe we should start planning for how to make this work. You're good at that. You're good at making setbacks into stepping stones."

Azula says, "Of course. You, however, have certainly lived up to your potential. I'm proud of you."

It takes Zuko a second to realize he has just been insulted. But it doesn't take him long to realize that these insults have nothing to do with reality or their current conversation; Azula is clearly seething about something deeper and more personal, but of course she is just going to bite him until he rubs his hand and walks away.

And so Zuko just grunts and says, "I hope the rest of your day is as pleasant as you are."

He promptly turns around and walks back into the luxurious resort suite and tries to decide what to do next.

Azula lingers on the balcony and hides her internal war of emotions.

* * *

The siblings avoid each other all day, but do wind up sharing dinner at a restaurant. It is a very nice place, and it should be relaxing. They, of course, secure a very private room, in which they will not be stared at.

It is far from unusual for siblings to be married, of course. Azula looked deeply into it when she was trying to make her decision about whether to do the logical thing and sacrifice Zuko for herself, or if the marriage could benefit her enough to justify keeping him.

It once was considered to be great fortune for royals to bear both a son and a daughter. That way, they could both have children. Since women were to have the blood of the dragon in them, and the females of the line to have preferable children.

Once upon a before Sozin, even if the elder sibling were male and Fire Lord, and often, the male sibling would become Fire Lord regardless, since raw power was rewarded and looked up to in a society in which the rage of fire was the guideline. The female Fire Lords were all very ambitious, vicious and potent in bending, but many princesses ─ all who declined so far in history had Fire Lord fathers ─ inherited the nature of their mothers.

But regardless, in those less-educated days, the child of the sister or female cousin would ascend after that of the Fire Lord's.

Gender was made quite more complex by that presumption. Again, however, the first firebender to tame a dragon and therefore become a royal was a woman. And the royals were all her descendants.

Marrying a sister made sense. Marrying a sister made the ascension of heirs less complicated.

Perhaps that was why people were less disgusted by Azula and Zuko's liaisons than they should have been.

"We don't really have to do much together during this vacation if you want," Zuko says as soon as the pained small talk ceases.

"Are you not thrilled to be married?" Azula asks sardonically and Zuko's jaw clenches.

"I..." He doesn't know how to answer.

"Oh, you're not thrilled about our marital sex and growing old together? You're not thinking up baby names yet?" Azula purrs mockingly and he wonders how she can be so calm about _that_. It would be _her_ who would be pregnant with them. _Them_. Oh, Agni, that gives Zuko heart palpitations.

"Don't joke." Zuko gazes at the menu so he doesn't have to look at her and imagine their babies.

"I actually am thinking about the naming thing, to be perfectly honest." Azula smirks. "But I suppose I'll keep it private if it's so _icky_ to you."

Zuko is taken aback by that statement, but he ignores it.

"I'm thrilled about the fact that you now are pretty unlikely to kill me for power." Not that father would have given Zuko the throne anyway. "If we both rule in tandem, you know?"

Azula shrugs. She _does_ agree with Zuko on that _one_ thing.

"So, do you have some kind of courtesan in mind, or are you just hoping if you ask me nicely enough sometimes I'll let you fuck me?" More. More of this.

Zuko sincerely wishes she would make this easier. Yes, he understands their complete fear of feelings. It's instilled in them since a young age. _But_ if she could just cough up what was bothering her so much, he could try to fix it and therefore have a way less miserable two more weeks of honeymoon.

He hesitates. "Are you upset because you're in love with her?"

Azula's only option is to scoff at that notion. "I love no one. Well, except for myself of course. I mean, _really_."

"What even happened between you and father?" Zuko demands and Azula is taken aback.

"That is so far away from your business..." Azula clears her throat and Zuko honestly thinks he has just made her squirm. "I don't know how you have the _nerve_ to even _suggest_ that."

Zuko is silent for a moment. "I don't plan on a courtesan."

"I bet you anything they'll toss you some concubine. At least _one_. I actually have read up on our past history of almost exclusively incestuous marriage." Azula gazes at her half-empty, crystalline glass of water. "Maybe some nice Water Tribe girl. They're more en vogue than Earth Kingdom these days. Because I doubt Mai or her parents would agree in a thousand years."

"So, Ty Lee's did?"

"They have much more than one daughter to properly marry off." Azula glances for the waitress and does not find her. "It's a generous deal for them."

Zuko is silent for a bit longer before deciding to change the subject to something more palatable.

* * *

They begin to fuck again that night, but Zuko actually stops when Azula is on his waist, about to remove her shirt.

"You're pissed about me, aren't you?" Zuko says as he stops her from grinding into him with a touch of his hands.

"Stop trying to psychoanalyze me," Azula snaps, but she does stop undressing. "Although, yes, it is nice that you've come to realize that perhaps some things are actually _your_ fault and not about someone else."

"You're pissed because I wouldn't let you touch my scar."

"Maybe."

She refuses to divulge more, but Zuko can tell that it was the truth.


	7. Chapter 7

Zuko does not know why he does not want Azula to touch his scar, but he can't.

It just feels weird. It feels _wrong_.

And, so, another night alone. Not that it bothers him. It _shouldn't_ bother him, because this is an arranged marriage. He does wonder, for a little too long, if his ancestors had any attraction to each other when they were forced to marry their siblings or cousins. Or if it was a cruel practice that had a reason for slowly dying out.

He tries not to think too much about those things, or how far from alarmed his uncle was. Or how his father's wrath is probably not yet expended.

Zuko _does_ remember watching Azula, up in a tree, first thoughts, maybe, of an unclean nature. But he was nearly thirteen and it had nothing to do with her being _Azula_ it just had to do with her being a _girl_ and he could so easily and naturally write it off as _that_.

His dreams are filled with trees, and memories of his father's fire consuming him, and that fire becoming blue, and that tree again, and those eyes. The thoughts, he thinks assuredly, will never quite leave him. But he rises, at last, and his sister, his wife, is already dressed and eating breakfast.

Silently, Prince Zuko sits down across from her.

She picks at her food. Examining every single piece as she eats it. Azula glances up at him, having no clue why he is suddenly _staring_ at her. Zuko is not the kind of person who pays much attention to others. No, not at all. He is belligerent and has no social awareness.

But he is staring at her food as she carefully checks every grain of rice.

Which is _not_ an abnormal process.

 _He_ looks at his food as if it is some weird Water Tribe delicacy.

Azula contemplates her actions for a few sparse seconds before deciding to comment on the dishes served to them. It seems worth talking about enough ─ or at least something to break the uncomfortable silence with.

"That's spicy. I can't remember if you like spicy or not... Not that I _care_ , of course," Azula says as she gestures at what he is carefully ladling onto his warm plate.

"I like spicy," Zuko says, and he wonders if it is far too much innuendo.

It might be, and so he just clears his throat and returns his attention to breakfast.

* * *

They are able to find some time alone in the wild, despite the guards nearby.

Yes, it is to prevent an assassination. But of course, Azula and Zuko could easily defend themselves. _Father_ wants to watch them at all times. He is a man who must control everything, and Zuko is still maddened by the fact that he does not know what rift has damaged his relationship with Azula so badly that she was willing to risk so much and do this.

It then occurs Zuko as he reclines on a mossy boulder by the somewhat serene pool, that maybe Azula _wanted_ this. Could that even be possible? Could this be some kind of wise political move that he just does not understand yet?

Suddenly, any vulnerable comments she has made about her wounds, or how she hurts too, or how he does not know her are all made hard to believe.

Zuko then looks up. He sees her swimming. Is that...? That should not be something that makes a difference. Or arouse you if you are her brother. It, at first, is just an observation that Azula swimming is a pretty rare thing, that he has not seen often.

She likes fire. Likes heat. If they are on the beach, she is on the hottest part of the sand, atop the dunes or resting on volcanic glass just to prove that she can, even if she has scrapes and cuts later. But she is in the water, and there is a certain peace in her expression as she disrupts the placid pool.

He likes to watch it. And not just for the very arousing quality, but because he enjoys watching her.

This honeymoon may be a very sorry excuse for one, but he does think Azula was right about what she said, even if it was just to cover up ulterior motives. And honestly, ulterior motives are probably worse than eternal misery.

But she did mention having a mistress the entire time.

A suggestion that bothers him right down to the core, even though he has no idea why. _Jealousy_ , he decides. No, no, _envy_. He needs one as well, but his options are so limited. Of course, as a prince, he can have any woman he wants, but Zuko never thought about anyone but his _original_ betrothed and later... Azula.

So Zuko decides upon his return that he will find one of his own, even if it is not in his nature.

* * *

The last night is the only night in which they share a bed.

And it is the only night in which the sex is actually passionate and lives up to the fire that pulses through their veins in place of blood. He can't think of anything other than this moment, of her, and she absolutely thrives on that.

It is, in Azula's opinion, the best part of sex, much more than just physical pleasure.

The concept that no matter how powerful, the person over or under or pressed against her cannot fathom anything but what she can give them at the time.

Zuko wouldn't care about that. All he wants is her.

And it could not be more _perfect_.

Scars and all.

* * *

Azula is completely remorseless about the fact that she has gone from enjoyable sex with her brother to negotiating a contract with a courtesan. It is, of course, not uncommon for someone in her position to do it, and father, despite his sadistic pleasure in punishing her, was lenient.

Ty Lee does not feel happy about it, and she feels happy about most things. She sits there in the room, feeling confused, unsure where this is going. It is a pretty life, not a bad one at all, but it is not one she has ever thought about wanting to live.

"I misunderstand. It's much better than anything a nobleman could offer. I'm not offering you some position as a slave girl, I'm offering you something much grander than that. I can, off of the top of my head, think of at least three famous royal mistresses who had _considerable_ power," Azula says with a slight smirk.

Of course Azula would know that. Azula knows every detail about everyone who had power in the Fire Nation over anything greater than a single blade of grass.

"I don't want power."

"You want _me_ ," Azula insists and Ty Lee purses her lips in a way that Azula does not like.

A way that Azula pretends to overlook.

"I'll just sign it," Ty Lee says very softly.

Azula nods, content enough with that. She is certain it is just the reluctance Azula felt about Zuko, which faded quickly enough.

Ty Lee looks at the contract, and then looks at Azula, and then looks back at the contract.

She takes a long deep breath, because there might as well be an invisible hand forcing her to sign it. A royal contract, whether given to her by Princess Azula or not, was not _optional_ , unless she wanted to die. She swallows, and does eventually sign it, as Azula watches the beads of sweat forming on her skin.

"I want this because I love you," Azula says so sweetly and Ty Lee isn't even capable of looking at her. "It's the only way we can be together without you being killed. That is such generosity from me."

"Have you ever...?" Ty Lee begins before her eyes suddenly are wide and then she sinks into her chair, trying to make herself small.

Azula mulls it over for a moment before deciding to pry. "Have I ever what?"

Ty Lee takes in a slow, tiny breath. "Have you heard that if you love something, you should let it go?"

And although, yes, Princess Azula _has_ heard that, she shakes her head.

"I want to keep you, of course. It isn't as if this marriage was my choice," Azula says and her fabrication is soft and Ty Lee _does_ want to wrap herself in it. "You think I could truly be satisfied by _Zuko_?"

Ty Lee takes a small breath in through her mouth and shakes her head.

"I'm happy to do this," Ty Lee agrees.

And meanwhile, Zuko is searching for a counter royal mistress of his own.

They never really did just enjoy games like tag and Pai Sho.


	8. Chapter 8

Zuko does not go to Ozai about his desire for a mistress, because he is not an idiot.

It is not as if Azula had any problem asking for one, or had any problem forcing Ty Lee's hand in the matter. But Ozai clearly has wanted Azula to change her mind and demand her brother's death since the first moment.

That moment in which Zuko's heart stopped and he thought he was going to die. One second, he was on her, tasting her, the sensation that could probably be described as _love_ coursing within him. He was never sure what to make of his liaisons with Azula, save for the fact that he truly enjoyed them. But right now he is unsure what the monster in his stomach is.

To be tasteless, he could identify the monster in his pants, but the beast in his stomach when he thinks about Azula and her _mistress_ is something he does not know how to explain away.

Like most things over the past year, to be honest. This has not been the easiest stretch of time, and there is no one to place that blame on but himself, of course.

That does not change the fact that he cannot stop thinking about her, and how she will not tell him a word about how she wants to defy father. She has never explained why she wanted to stretch out a hand to him in the first place, has never told him why she thought of their sex as defiance against him.

Father loves Azula; Azula loves father. They have a perfect little relationship and a happy little family that Zuko never got to be a part of.

Zuko hated them both for that, and he still might, even now that he is being forced to realize that Azula has also suffered due to circumstance and fate.

Ozai aside, Azula and the monster in Zuko's stomach aside, the prince is now examining his options. Of course, Mai is out of the question, because she was... _disgusted_ by his affair with Azula for some reason. He could not understand why, because Mai does not care about things, and it was on Azula just as much as it was on Zuko.

Zuko never hurt Azula, and Zuko could not understand why anyone expected him to know better than her, or to take more blame on his shoulders than her.

"... or something more exotic," finishes the quite well-dressed and well-groomed yet somehow disgusting man as Zuko sits down in the office.

It has too much bamboo in it, and the paintings have transcended classy and moved into too sexual, in the prince's opinion. He remembers when he was younger, and his uncle had to first explain many uncomfortable sexual things when Zuko first walked down to the engineering decks of their ship and saw the ink paintings on the wall.

The naked women were so graphic, and Zuko was... well, not quite aroused, not aroused the way he wound up being when he was with Mai or Azula. And those women were painted to be beautiful, but none of them were really as beautiful as someone flushed and digging her nails into his skin.

Uncle had to explain things, and Zuko has always been quite turned off from pornographic images since then. They are now only equated to the scent of oil, men he could not look in the eyes, and his uncle seeming so _calm_ as he talked about it to an agape thirteen year old.

"I don't know what to think yet," Zuko says, trying to sound more _adult_.

He is an adult. He is a married man, a married man who is now co-heir apparent; he will now rule the country beside his sister.

"You must have already had so many options," says the man that Zuko is trying to remember the name of. It was such a common one, Chan or Li, but he pronounced it in a weirdly fancy way that Zuko was unsure if he misheard it.

In another world, Prince Zuko would have used his royal status to bed many women. But in a world in which misfortune left its mark upon him so many times, he has not had the chance. He does, of course, display the appearance that he has. Men look down on someone who would be _inexperienced_.

Azula likes him, anyway.

That monster in his stomach growls again. _Azula likes Ty Lee better._

"I do think I want someone exotic. Someone really... hot." That was not specific, and Zuko fears he has outed himself as inexperienced.

"I have some interesting Earth Kingdom girls. And some Water Tribe ones..." The man furrows his brow. Zuko thinks for a moment. Maybe he was _Chang_ and not _Chan_. _Chun_? "Why don't you try them out? Any girl would be eager to."

Zuko shrugs. "That sounds fine."

* * *

Zuko probably should not have started off his conversation with Mai with those words.

"I didn't mean it that way. And it's not auditions. I just want to say that I was thinking about you the whole time. I've always loved you," Zuko says and he feels like a total fool.

She stands there, looking at him impassively. Mai truly does not care if Zuko loves her or not; she just cares that her family is in upset, and that Mai is going to have a lot of trouble living this down. Maybe her reputation does not matter, but her freedom does, and she did not have a lot of it in the first place.

"What you just described to me is holding auditions for a mistress. Azula has Ty Lee because she..." Mai squints. "No. Azula doesn't love her. But Azula doesn't want to let her go. You just want to upshow her."

"I don't want to let you go either." Zuko's hands twitch to touch her, but he decides he wants to keep his hands, and so he stops himself.

"There aren't second chances for this kind of thing." Mai might wish there were, or she might not.

* * *

Princess Azula paces in her quarters, thinking about what she has just learned of her brother. It enraged her, and she could not explain the feeling in her gut. It was one she had never felt before, and it was one she wanted to crush or electrocute.

Ty Lee is with her, feeling nervous, flushed and feverish. The acrobat really _does_ want to talk to Azula. They are friends before this new, strange dynamic that they will need to take time to explore. But Ty Lee thinks Azula wants to fuck right now, to... make herself feel better.

But it won't stop her from feeling hurt about Zuko going behind her back and... supposedly auditioning girls. It really won't, and Ty Lee wants to _help_ Azula with that, not _sleep with her_.

"This is a little rushed," Ty Lee whispers very faintly even though she knows how entirely futile this is.

"Yes, well, my brother rushed things a little bit too, don't you think? Mai told you as well I'm sure," Azula snaps, clutching her hairbrush with an admirable force.

"About the..." Ty Lee hesitates before whispering, "auditions?"

"Yes," Azula replies sharply. "Get on the bed." There is no response. " _Please_ get on the bed."

Ty Lee does so in the electrically charged silence. "Azula, I think maybe you should talk to him. I think he's just jealous about this, and it doesn't seem like Zuko to..." She trails off when she sees Azula's eyes and knows that she said the exact wrong thing.

Azula moves forward as if she were striking and enemy and presses her rosy lips against Ty Lee's. Her smooth, pale hands slide under Ty Lee's shirt much less delicately than they used to, unbuttoning it from the inside and tearing it off like the seal on a letter and not wrapping paper on a present.

She always had superhuman agility, but right now she is angry. Right now she is jealous and confused about her brother, which Ty Lee understands, and which Ty Lee really wants to help Azula with. Of course Azula has mixed feelings about Zuko, but this is not how to figure them out.

Azula kisses her fiercely and Ty Lee kisses her back to the response of a burning sensation. Her nipples harden under the caress of Azula as the princess slides her mistress onto her back. Fumbling slightly and wondering if she should stop this and try to talk Azula down instead, Ty Lee slides off Azula's clothes. There is certainly a longing within her, but it is uneasy at best.

Azula guides Ty Lee's hands along her flawless body and Ty Lee tries to cling to the sensation of the toned but perfect curves.

But she hesitates when Azula moves much more forcefully, more like an invasion than a dance they used to share before Zuko.

 _"You know you want_ me _, Ty Lee_ ," Azula snarls and that voice does not belong to the woman Ty Lee loves.

"I want you, princess!" Ty Lee shouts, more to fight her inhibitions than encourage the encounter.

Forcing herself to focus on the moment instead of her dizzy daydreams, Azula trying to forget her motives.

It works.

It doesn't work at all.

It seems like it works.

* * *

"You want to play a game, ZuZu?" Azula asks and he slowly shakes his head. "Oh, but you're already playing."

"I don't want to. I thought that mistresses were the norm." He sound crisp and clear, and Azula is mildly impressed by his confident tone. _But_ he is not intimidating in the slightest.

"I would just let you apologize and crawl back to me. But I think this might be fun. We haven't played together in _so very long_. Do remember that I tend to make up the rules."

Azula's gaze lingers on Zuko for a moment longer, and then she walks past him. Her menacing, cold smirk fades as soon as she is out of his sight.

He gazes after her, and she knows that he is looking. She _knows_ that he _wants_ her. She also knows that he wants to play a game with her.

And unfortunately, even if he is supposedly holding these auditions tomorrow.

Azula always wins.


End file.
